Saturday, June 19, 2010

Danny's "yes"

“Lord, please either change his heart or change mine.” That has been my prayer for the past year and a half. Danny was pretty sure our family was complete with Alyssa and Parker. Then God led us to adopt Reagan, and Danny was even surer that we were done with three. I wasn’t convinced. But I didn’t want to push. There are significant challenges involved in adopting a child (as well as, of course, parenting said child), and I didn’t want him to resent me for talking him into it. I truly believe that God has given Danny the primary role in leading our family. Nagging him into a fourth child just to please me would have eventually put a strain on our marriage, and would have dishonored the roles God has established to bless and protect us.
As my desire to mother another has grown, I’ve had to work harder and harder to stay quiet. I didn’t keep my longings a secret from him, but I determined to always let him initiate the conversation. Every so often he’d come up with something like “are you really sure you want another kid?” And my answer was always an enthusiastic “yes!” As time has gone on, he’s started those discussions more and more frequently. I’d explain my desire to provide a home for an orphan that might not otherwise have one, and all the ways I thought our family would be exceedingly blessed by another child. (We’ve discovered with Reagan that the joy she brings to us far outweighs any benefit we’ve provided for her!). He always listened carefully, but definitely wasn’t like-minded. Through it all I kept praying my prayer.
Finally in mid-February Danny asked me to research what our various options might be. Of course I was excited, but didn’t want to get my hopes up too much. I joined an adoption agency research group, investigated the various countries that are open to international adoption, carefully looked into foster-adoption, and even explored charting our own path to a child in Malawi where adoption laws are largely untested. I reported it all back to Danny, but he continued to be content with three. With my research basically complete and my heart about done with wondering, I recently set a deadline for myself. If Danny hadn’t given the green light for another adoption by Reagan’s birthday I would consider that to be God’s indication that I should stop considering it as well. But I kept praying.
Then on Sunday, we celebrated Father’s Day with my family. Totally unbeknownst to me, this is the card Danny prepared and presented to my dad:

Which means… I get to be a mama again! I just kept asking Danny, “really?” “Really?” “Are you sure?” He maintained the same slightly-panic-stricken look on his face that he’s had each time I’ve told him we were pregnant, but with a resolved YES. God had been working on his heart using His Word, Danny’s love for me, and the counsel of some wise men. Though I would have remained confident in God’s goodness if He had chosen to answer my prayer differently, I am beyond thrilled to announce that He has another child in store for us! I’ll share more details soon, but this is already plenty long enough. I’ve got nesting to do!

11 comments:

M or J said...

SO cool you guys! I'm thrilled for you and can't wait to see how this story unfolds! Keep us posted! Im curious to know how Danny knows you're going to get a boy...but I'm sure I'll find out.

Julie said...

WOW....that's the coolest thing ever! What a very special story...CONGRATS! I can't wait to read along in your journey and meet your new son!

:)

Annemarie said...

This totally made me cry. I had a similiar experience and the faith that God planted in my hear by watching Him do something without my prodding or "helping" is a faith that has produced fruit in abundance. I knew before that He was powerful, yet seeing Him change a heart ...wow, it's something to behold.

I am so excited for you all! Can't wait to hear how it all unfolds!

~Annemarie

Jessica said...

So happy for you guys! Can't wait for more detail!

NHP said...

Wonderful News.
Excited for your family!!!
Natasha

The Leoness said...

(happy tears...and there's a big smile on my face, but you probably already knew that!) Praising God and praying for your newest addition!!!

Elle said...

This makes me teary. My first visit here. So glad you commented. I cherish a similar hope in my heart but Husband is not there yet. I'll be reading to see what God continues to unfold.

mrsbroccoliguy said...

Oh my goodness, that's SO exciting! (and can I say, your story sounded very familiar because it's pretty much the way my husband and I decided to adopt both of our kids... God just loves to teach us wives patience!)

Heather said...

Oh Congratulations Laura! This is wonderful news!! I can't wait to see how the rest of this story plays out!

By the Brook said...

Just love how he told you!!!! Praise the Lord for changing his heart.

Andersons said...

So when I said congrats to you in the hallway at vbs I hadn't read this post.... totally made me cry! So fun to read your story, and look forward to seeing the next child God brings into your life! :)
~Ilka