My EIGHT-year-old!

S is for Snake

We're not fans of conventional pets. Danny had dogs growing up and I had a cat, but for many reasons, neither one of us is especially excited about the idea of bringing furry creatures into our home. As a result we've adopted fish (including 2 which have lived over a year - we do take good care of our pets), a frog, and currently, a perpetually-egg-laying cockatiel. Our friend and pastor Rick Holland didn't think that was quite enough however, and volunteered his boys' snake to take up residence in Parker's room. This mama wasn't too sure about that idea, but agreed to a trial run. So Ned (or Pumpkin or Candy...) the corn snake is here on loan, with the option to adopt. The kids are having a ball, and even Reagan (the most timid of the bunch) has been willing to hold it. We'll just see if we all still like the thing when it's ready for its mouse dinner next week.

Just odd

This remnant of Reagan's birthday party floated around here for 8 days. 8 days people! Anyone else ever had a regular old latex balloon float for more than a day?

What once was lost has now been found!

Eight years ago I lost track of one of my favorite Bibles. It wasn't my everyday copy so I didn't notice it was gone right away. I looked everywhere I could think to look, but eventually gave up the search and gave up hope. Until a few weeks ago, when I received a facebook message from a girl I went to college with. She noticed my Bible on the lampstand of a friend in Kansas, of all places, and recognized my name. Turns out that this girl in Kansas used to work at our church was given my Bible in the course of her duties there. Since both my name and phone number had changed between the time I received the volume and the time I lost it, and our church has about 10,000 regular attendees, no one was able to find me. Over the years the girl in Kansas had tried to figure out who I was, but eventually gave up and just enjoyed the Bible. Until today, when she was finally able to reunite me with my beloved Book. It arrived in the mail with a sweet letter detailing its journey over the past 8 years. I'm thrilled to have it back, and grateful to the guardian who both cared for it and graciously returned it so many years later.

My baby (for now) turned 4 today! Reagan is the bittiest little thing you'll ever see, and will probably still be the smallest member of our family even when she's a "big" sister, but she's most definitely growing up. She loves to sing, tell jokes, pray, and care for her dollies - especially "Lucy," a sad little dollar-store find that she inexplicably adores. Her deep-throated giggle is sweet enough to make anyone want to join in, yet her petite frame conceals plenty of backbone and fire. Watching her personality unfold is truly one of our greatest joys, and it is a privilege to be her mama. I don't take for granted that our gain is the result of another's loss, and I'm grateful to both my God and a woman I may never meet for the life that we celebrated today. Happy Birthday Reagan!

Guess what the mailman brought me today?

Our I-171H!!! I know, you're all jumping up and down with excitement. Especially the 99% of you who, like my husband, have no idea what an I-171H is. But a few of you out there have also stalked your mailman for that precious piece of paper indicating that US Citizenship and Immigration Services thinks you're fit to be a parent. I know I can count on you to share my joy =). Now we're just waiting on the travel call. It might come next week, it might come next year, but now we're really ready.

MIA

I'm still here, but my online time and tasks lately have been significantly limited by a sick computer. The kids' lapbook works fine for e-mail and school games but much too slow for anything else. Thanks to a good friend with far more technical knowledge than me or my favorite man, it's back to full strength and no longer mysteriously redirecting me from benign searches for country music lyrics and bird nail clippers to sites much more graphic and less godly in character. A few of the things that have been keeping us busy around here include....

A three-day cousin/grandparent trip up to a cabin in the Sierras, complete with customized camper tees. Needless to say, the kids came home elated and exhausted, welcomed by a refreshed but lonely mama.

A milestone for Parker. He has learned to tie a bow, first perfected on the apron he uses when "helping" mama in the kitchen.

A little chat with Tinkerbell, who will provide the theme for a much-anticipated approaching birthday party. Rainy days at Disneyland make for blessedly short character-greeting lines.

A little extra proof that the girl is indeed Asian. I thought the socks with sandals thing was cultural, but perhaps it's in the blood.

A particularly fun field trip full of touchable reptiles - one of many activities we've enjoyed with our new homeschool group (which is, in itself, a huge answer to prayer).

And a birthday celebration at the Happiest Place on Earth for a brother who is still a half an earth away (yes, we have a referral!). Though it was strange and sad to be apart from him, we have every confidence that he is being loved and well-cared for in our absence. We hope and pray that we may have him home for Christmas. (More about our new adoption story is here... send me an e-mail at momwholoveschrist@hotmail.com if you'd like the password).

Me, a soccer mom. Who would have thought?

I can't say that I've ever dreamed of being a soccer mom, primarily because I grew up in the Land of Perpetual Drizzle. Soccer in the Seattle area generally amounts to little more than a group of children sliding around in mud, providing less-than-sufficient entertainment for the shivering spectators huddled together under super-sized umbrellas. Not that I was ever unfortunate enough to participate in either role. I do, however, have vivid memories of the pity I felt upon viewing such spectacles from the comfort of my family's heated Suburban on the way to real entertainment... like shopping. An athlete I am not.

However, I happened to marry a firm believer in the value of team sports. I've been reluctant to join in due to the demanding schedules of some leagues, but we were able to locate one in our area that has a rather gentle, family-oriented approach to that little black and white ball. So we decided to give it a try. Alyssa and Parker get to practice in the same place on the same day at the same time, and their games are back to back most Saturday mornings for just 8 weeks. Their coaches are pretty laid back, and I'm not sure Parker has even noticed that his team has lost every game.

Not surprisingly, the personalities of our two athletes are abundantly evident on the field. Alyssa works hard, but her sweetness makes her reluctant to try to take the ball away from anyone. I'm quite sure she enjoys chatting with the goalie even more than following the game. The goalie has become a good friend and she's getting good exercise. Her team has even won a few, so we'll call this season a success.

Parker on the other hand thinks the ball should be at his feet at all times. He's quickly learning the game and his enthusiasm makes us all laugh. For all the time he spends on the ground, he could sub in for the ball if his defensive role doesn't work out. Just because I'm such a proud mama I have to share a bit of the e-mail Parker's coach sent to all of the players after last week's game:

"We all enjoyed Parker intercepting the ball from (it seemed) every Fireballs player. What a heart and great timing, today we discovered our best Defender. Thanks to Parker the Fireballs did not scored a goal in the second half, he really helped out our goalie at the half."

Then this week he said:

"I could mention Parker in every game summary, he is by far, the player who is evolving the quickest; and one of the few players who plays the whole game. That is how good he is!"

We're grateful that each of the kids have great coaches: non-yellers who care more about the kids than about winning. We're grateful that they're having fun, learning a new game, and entertaining all of us while they're at it. And I'm especially grateful that through all of that we've encountered no rain and no mud. Being a soccer mom really isn't so bad.

Up close and silly

Pooltime!

Over the past couple of months our pool has been putting in a lot of overtime. We've had some dear friends on hand to share it with, and they've helped us get creative in our use of the water. This night we decided to add a little soap to the spa...

Another night, Danny and the children somehow all ended up in the pool with their clothes on...

I can't imagine why Alyssa, Parker and Reagan weren't anxious for school to get started again!

Part IV

Part four includes a photo of one very cute kid! Send me an e-mail if you still need the password (momwholoveschrist@hotmail.com).

Part III

Part III is now posted here.

Which one is not like the other?

Danny and Parker spent last weekend in the dirt and mud camping with the guys. Alyssa, Reagan and I got dressed up and enjoyed an afternoon at the theater. Each group was convinced that the other missed out, proving once again that boys are just different.

Part II

Part II of our new adoption story is over here. Send me an e-mail if you still need the password.

A new journey, a new blog

We're changing countries and I'm changing formats. As much as I love Three Times a MOM, I've determined that as long as we're in the midst of the adoption process to become a mom of four, my adoption-related posts will need to reside elsewhere. There are a lot of unknowns facing us in the months ahead, and one of those unknowns is how much my bloggy ramblings might influence the authorities we're placing ourselves under. I intend to continue blogging here with our normal family stuff. Anytime I post at my new site I'll give you the heads-up here. However, we want to err on the side of caution and password-protect any posts relating to our new son. Since Blogger doesn't allow me to do that, you'll need to find me here: http://fourtimesamom.wordpress.com/. If I know you in real life, or know your blog, or know you from a forum, I'd be happy to give you the password. So just ask! Leave a comment here with your e-mail address or send an e-mail to momwholoveschrist@hotmail.com. See you there! And here too!

In the meantime...

we ride sheep and bulls! It was $1 day at our favorite local fair yesterday so we brought along some of our favorite friends and cousins to enjoy the funnel cakes, livestock, pig races, mechanical bulls, and the highlight of the day - a sheep riding competition. Ironically, we don't let our kids on the rides at fairs due to this mama's fear for their safety (don't feel too sorry for them - we do have Disneyland passes), but somehow it never crossed our minds to worry about them being thrown under a racing sheep. They had a blast, escaping with only a little dirt, well... everywhere. Parker took 2nd place, and both Alyssa and our friend Abigail were interviewed and photographed for our local paper. Tells you how much is going on around here when Mutton Bustin' makes the front page!

Danny looks pretty handsome, and tough too don't you think?

Redirecting

The mind of man plans his way,
But the LORD directs his steps.

(Proverbs 16:9)

We've made our plans, but it seems like God is changing them in amazing and exciting ways. I can't post details yet, and I may need to move to a password protected site for a while, but I'll give you a hint: our plane to #4 will be flying west, not east!

Nesting

No, not me. The bird. The bird that we thought was a male... until he laid an egg. And then another. Apparently Maltby is a girl, and a little mommy in the making at that. Of course, her little eggs aren't going to hatch and we'll have to wait several weeks for her to lose interest in them, but she's making a valiant effort at keeping them warm and safe. Lest you think I'm a bad pet owner, I have tried to make nest-making as easy as possible for our mate-less bird. I've provided little bowls, filler and special food, all upon the advice of the experts at our local bird store. But do you think she wants any of that? Nope. She seems quite content with her little spot on the floor next to her food dish, and has promptly pushed and plucked away any helps I've added to the cage. So there she'll sit, at least until her environment just too filthy to leave undisturbed a moment longer.

Paperchasing

While my presence here has been negligible as of late, there is no need to worry that my laptop has been neglected. The paperchase is on, and I'd nearly forgotten just how time-consuming the process can be! If you've never before pursued adoption, your head would spin to know just how many sheets of officially sealed, notarized, stamped, signed, authenticated, translated, and logged-in paper are consumed in the process of bringing an orphan home. I'd list them here for you, but it would surely put you to sleep, or lead you to false conclusions about the praiseworthiness of this blogger. I have concrete proof in the form of a Little Miss asleep upstairs that every second, every cent, and every signature is repayed a thousandfold through the joy of parenting the child you know God meant to be a part of your family.

Fortunately (knock on wood), the process has gone relatively smoothly so far. Danny agreed to be a daddy again one month ago today, and both our homestudy (a social worker's report detailing why we're fit parents) and dossier (the collection of documents that will represent who were are to the Chinese government) are nearly complete. We still have to get approval from U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services before we can send our stuff overseas, but it took us about 10 months to get to that point with Reagan's adoption. The hard part this time is knowing that our son is alive somewhere and waiting for us. With Reagan we knew she probably hadn't been born when we started the process (indeed, she wasn't born until 14 months after our first application was sent in), so I didn't feel quite the fire underneath my feet. Now, every moment that our paperwork is delayed means another moment our little guy is living without a mama. I have to keep reminding myself that God is in control of even this. He knows what's best for all of us, and, incomprehensible as it is to me, His best right now means that part of our family is a half a world away. Please pray with us that God will be the Father our son needs right now, and that He'll speed our paperwork along to unite us at just the right moment. Thanks friends!

It's a boy!

We're on a paperchase for a little guy! I've explained a little bit about our journey to Danny's "yes" and a bit more about where we're going, but not much of anything about who this newest member of our family might be.

Though it seems a little strange to be able to "shop" for the characteristics you want in a child, adoption does afford that opportunity to some extent. The vast majority of the adoption process is completely outside of our control. So is our child's history and everything else that will influence his personality, health and development until we bring him home. We are given a little control however over the superficial characteristics we're willing to parent. We therefore, have carefully thought through our options, submitted our leanings to God's ultimate authority, and trusted Him to provide us with wisdom and counsel for making the decision that will most glorify Him.

All of that has led us to a preference for a little boy. From the most pragmatic of standpoints, it will even us up at two girls, two boys, and make the room-sharing thing a snap. When we told the kids our new child might be a boy Alyssa was initially a little disappointed. She contemplated it for a moment however, and then concluded, "Parker, I think this will be a great thing. Then I won't have to play swords with you anymore!" Parker indeed, could use a brother as he routinely laments his sisters' intense interest in dolls and ambivalence towards all weaponry.

We also were drawn towards requesting a male because more boys need homes. Generally speaking, more adoptive parents prefer girls. I'm not sure why, though we fell into this category with our first adoption. Our preference then was based on a desire to have a girl-boy-girl family, so that at least if Parker had to be the middle child he would have the distinction of the only boy. Who knew that God would have four in store for us?! We also pretty ignorant about all things adoption-related, and had no idea that so many little guys out there needed families. Now we'll have the opportunity to be blessed by two of each.

Many people then have found it strange that we're going to China. "Doesn't China only have little girls available?" is a question I've been asked more than once. The answer, generally, is yes if you want an infant. Which brings us to another characteristic we strangely get to shop for: age. We love having our kids close together. Alyssa and Parker are just 19 months apart, and Reagan was born 28 months after Parker. We initially thought we'd be bringing home a toddler from Vietnam and would have had #2 and #3 even closer together. I'd actually given away all of our baby stuff and was quite thoroughly shocked to have been referred an infant. Of course, in retrospect God knew exactly what He was doing and brought the child into our life that was and is perfect for our family. Reagan didn't even seem to mind sleeping in a pack 'n play and having her diaper changed on top of the washing machine!

Given the fact that Reagan will be four in October, we really didn't want to start over with another baby. I suppose it's no surprise that there's also a greater need for families willing to adopt older children. There were certainly be extra challenges involved in bringing home a preschooler vs. an infant, but we believe that the benefits to our child and to our family will far outweigh them. Our hope is that we will be matched with a boy about a year younger than Reagan, up to maybe an 18 month spread. That will mean that he'll probably be between three and three-and-a-half when he comes home.

Another distinctive of the China program (and many programs with older children) is that our little boy will have some special needs. China currently has a list of 1800 children waiting for families with needs ranging from blindness to a corrected cleft lip. We are open to a range of needs, but prefer something of the mild or correctable variety. That, again, is something we choose, and we'll work closely with our agency to select someone from that list that would be the best fit for our family. Even if our guy isn't on the list right now, children are added about once a month and we have no doubt that we'll quickly be able to identify the boy God has in store for us.

We're anxiously awaiting the opportunity to share with you even more details about who our little guy is. You'll know as soon as we do!